I could never figure out
Just why Aunt Alice thought
I’d want a nose hair trimmer or
Exactly why she bought
Me red and green argyle socks
Composite baseball bats
A ‘love my kitty’ stocking though
I do not have a cat
A country western DVD
A dubious fruitcake
That boasted a 2013
Expiration date
But when she gave me this dumb scarf
The answer became clear
I recognized it as the one
I gave to her last year
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Yes, I suppose you can look at it that way!!
But I suppose it happens with all of us
Oh dear. She must’ve lost track!
Yes, I suppose regifters need to have a good memory!
I would think so. And at least check the expiration dates!
We have all had an Aunt Alice at one time or another methinks…nice piece of satire Marissa. Coincidentally in the UK papers recently a ‘nose hair trimmer’ was no. 2 in a list of the worst Christmas gifts a man can give a woman…an electric drill being no. 1. I think (could be wrong) a Weight Watchers gift card came third. You really ought to think trough a few husband gifts to wife and put it to your sword of poetry!
Yes, that would make for a good one. Last year I did one about bad Christmas gifts so hopefully it won’t overlap too much with that one…not that anyone would notice anyway!!
If I can recall where I spotted the UK list of naff gifts for gals I’ll send it you…it was rather funny…more so in that I once got Shirl the mother of electric drills (I am hopeless at DIY) a couple of years back and as it turns out she was really pleased with it! Yours, Ivor Holeinmytemple, Braintree, Essex
That’s probably what I would end up doing with it as well.
You’re a cruel woman young Marissa
Hey, at least I didn’t give Shirley a drill for Christmas.
A vacuum cleaner is a no-no. Ha ha!
Oh yeah, for sure!
Got to love Aunt Alice, at she is consistent.
Right, if nothing else….which is most likely the case.
Haha. At least you can pretty much guess what you’re getting.
That’s true!
Too funny!
Ah the joy of re- gifting 🙂
It never gets old…no really, it doesn’t!!
Ooops! Like minded …. lol
For sure!
😄😀👍
Oops, perhaps you can doubledown with the fruitcake
Might not be a bad idea.
Those bloody Indian givers!
From Jessie- a recovering Indian giver
Takes one to know one I suppose.
I did have a friend who would give me a lot of crap she had lying around as gifts but she really didn’t make any bones about it. I remember she gave me a bullet belt and a rhinestone bandana and I loved them both. Had them for years.
That is actually hilarious, bless. Just a question, what is a bullet belt?
…. and that’s why I will never be a re-gifter. I would become an Aunt Alice because I would completely lose track of what not to give who!!
… but anyone who gives me a fruitcake deserves to get it back! Oh, who am I kidding? I’d eat the damn cake
Oh Joanne, I’m in my comments section and totally got confused between whether you were answering my comment on your blog or your comment on mine so if my comment on yours is a bit confusing, that’s why!
And yes, a regifter must have a good memory!!
HAHAHAHAHA!! For some reason, that confusion of where I am in comments happens to me when I’m on my iPad.
There are more than a few disjointed comments of mine floating around out there in blogland 😉
Well, at least you commented. I always say that commenting on someone’s blog is like providing beer at a party. You are only required to bring the cheapest.
Agreed! All comments are bonus 🙂
You need to keep a notebook…….. 😉
It could be worse.
Every family has an “Aunt Alice”. I think all of them should get together and have a white elephant party! Give ’em a dose of their own medicine and such…
Sounds good to me!
A new twist to “what goes around, comes around”????? Hey, what the heck, recycling is in!
Yes, absolutely. Aunt Alice is just hip on a new trend!!
Hi Marissa…Oh—the mystery of gifting! Those socks—those scarves—and those obligatory ‘cakes-of-fruity—expiration…Tis the comings and the goings of Holiday’s futures and Holiday’s pasts…But wait! Holiday’s present—for those quickly passing moments—one almost never—quite knows—what that wrapped up box—may contain—donchaknow…Wishing you a ‘wonder—full weekend…Phil
Thank you! Well, all part of the wonder of the holidays I suppose…for better or worse!
I can take that nose hair trimmer off your hands…sigh.
Ha! I ‘m going to leave this one alone.
Nice twist. Fruitcake gets better with age 😂
Does it really? I’m not much of a fruitcake girl. Chocolate’s always been more my thing. Unfortunately, that does not get better with age.
Oh yes. Fruitcake ages well. Like Christmas pudding. And me.
Of course!
I keep asking for one of those trimmers for my ears–or for my family to just shut the hell up about the thick tangles that started spilling out the side of my head a few years back–do you think if I can one of these “excess hair trimmers” to my wife this year….
…nah, I’m not that self-destructive.
Oh yeah, you better pray she doesn’t even see this comment!
Ohh, this is why I don’t regift. Too paranoid I’m going to slip up, or someone will get offended lol. If you’re going to do that, you need to take copious notes. Damn it, Aunt Alice.
Like a liar, a regifter must have a good memory.
And so the lesson learned (or hopefully) … do not give dumb gifts for you never know when you shall receive them yourself!!! Tee hee …. ❤
One of the ten holiday commandments Amy!! Thank you!
We get what we deserve? Horrible thought, that!
Your list of weird gift items, Marissa, made me laugh! There are so many odd things out there, who ever wants them?!! 😀
Well, at some point someone thought someone else wanted them…I suppose…or maybe no one made the effort and Aunt Alice made even less!!
Oh, the memories come back… Ten holiday commandments are an excellent idea.
Oh gosh, maybe my next poem!!
Reeeee-gifter (to the tune of the Ricola commercials).
I like it!
Aunt Alice is friends with the man’s aunt!! 🙂
I loved this poem but the like button is gone!!
I guess everyone knows one.
Odd about the like button. I see it…maybe just not loading.
Ooopsies! Gotta love the regift 😉
Yep, for sure!
Discovering your world with a lot of curiosity and now following you. All the best 😉
Thank you! I look forward to reading your posts as well.
Nose hair trimmer…and the returned scarf….Marissa your writing makes me laugh so
That is all I can hope for!