When the temperature plummets to the nth degree,
And you’re sure there must be somewhere better to be,
When you’re crammed in a club that’s dark and way too loud,
And you’re fighting off a drunk bridge and tunnel crowd,
When looking back, the highlight of your night so far,
Was talking to that stranger you met by the bar,
Though admittedly he’s not what you’d call pretty,
At least he made you laugh and was somewhat witty,
A midnight kiss in the cards? You think what the hell!,
Till across the room you see, he’s kissing someone else.
When you find yourself deep in a conversation,
With a college girl who flew in on vacation,
When you find yourself holed up in a bathroom somewhere,
She’s throwing up her guts as you’re holding her hair,
It’s clear her affection for you is quite telling,
You’re declared her best friend amidst the expelling.
When you’re back on the streets, finally see your friends,
Through the window of a pub down at the north end,
You smile with happiness as you start to think,
How nice it would be just to stop in for a drink,
The bouncer informs you this comes with the condition,
Of coughing up the 50 bucks for admission.
When 5 AM finds you in a place no finer,
Than at the dank, depressing, greasy spoon diner,
Where you come stumbling in with a sloppy gait,
Cause at some point you lost your heel in a sewer grate,
You reflect on a night you think never again, You,
order the most fattening thing on the menu,
And your makeup is running and your breath is sour,
Another resolution shot to hell in 5 hours,
And you raise a coffee cup to silently cheer,
How it’s already so much better than last year.