Somewhere in Iraq, March 28, 2035 9:56 AM PST
The head of ISIL is discovered
On the button his hand hovers
Advisors ask him “Are you sure?”
As sweat comes out of every pore
He says “The weak make second guesses”
And so fateful, down he presses
With nothing left he must await
Reaction from United States
Washington D.C., March 28, 2035 10:04 AM PST
We find our leader in good health he
Photoshops his morning selfie
Erases wrinkles in his neck
When suddenly he gets a text
He can’t believe what he is seeing
And so he calls for a staff meeting
And so his people come abounding
For the news he is announcing
ISIL sent the atom bomb
In form of an emoticon
No one really had a clue
As to the next thing they should do
Till one suggested that perchance
They ask the President of France
So logical it seemed that next
That they should send to him a text
And so they sent it right away
And waited on what he would say
And by the phone they sat absorbed
Till they got back “That’s totes adorbs!”
They texted back “About the bomb”
Got “Sorry, was meant for my mom!
But don’t worry I got your text
And think I know what to do next
As serious as this all looks
You should unfriend him on Facebook
Or maybe it’s got to the stage
To troll him on his Youtube page
Or maybe something like this calls
For a mean game of volleyball
‘Cept this time there’s a winning team
And only they will get ice cream”
“France I like how your mind works
But the truth is I’m really hurt”
“Well U.S. if that’s the deal
Then call and tell him how you feel”
“Forgive me while I am digesting
What you seem to be suggesting
Me the leader of the nation
Having a phone conversation?
Does anyone still do that now
Don’t think I can remember how
Plus he won’t pick up at all
You know he prob’ly screens his calls”
“You’re right, forgive my impudence
It’s utterly ridiculous
The only thing that can be done
Is if you bring out the big guns”
“Oh no surely you can’t mean…”
“Oh yes, go to your iPhone screen!”
And so with a mind for revenge
The leader types in and hits send
And so he is up to the challenge
America’s fate in the balance
So eagerly he does await
The answer to his frowny face
A poem inspired by a blog by Phil Taylor Hey Millenials! WTF Are You Gonna Do?
Glorious Results Of A Misspent Youth 
It’s probably more of a prediction than you know.
It may well be. I don’t know though, the unwillingness to communicate could be good or bad.
Well, press all the tight buttons to make sure your next President is not someone who has his finger only on the N button! 🙂
Yes, I don’t know if I’m embarrassed or proud to admit that I just recently registered to vote.
So if it’s your first time, you’d better get it right! 😊
Well, I’m not voting for Trump so…
I should hope not! 😆
Thanks for the shout out. Your poem is hilarious, brilliant, funny and kind of scary.
And I’m going to reblog it in a little while.
Oh wow, thanks Phil. So glad you liked it! Thanks for the inspiration!
What Phil typed.
Yep, sometimes the other comments just say it all. Thanks for letting me know you’re out there!
Always. Love your poetry.
That poem made me chuckle and gave me shivers at the same time. Great, Marissa!!!
Yes, I put an amusing spin on it but it could be kind of scary but better a text bomb than a real one…although who knows what could follow.
Right! That is what I thought! Let’s stick with the f-bombs …. 😃
I agree with Erika ( above ) it is amusing and disturbing. You just wonder what the private conversations heads of state have about these terrible events
Yes, for sure…and to think what could happen if it was all down to texting.
What is our world coming to?! No second guesses!
That’s a good question. As far as answers go…I’m afraid they are few and far between.
Answers? Provably have to google them! 😉
A bit of Dr. Strangelove in this one, Marissa – and that’s very high in my list. Great poem!
Unfortunately I’ve never seen it but I will take your word that it’s a high compliment.
The highest of compliments, Marissa. 🙂 Peter Sellers and Stanley Kubrick and a splash of some very dark humor.
Ooooh, sounds impressive!
Love everything about it–the rhyme and commentary on our handling of daily communication (really, who “talks” anymore?) Applying it all to our world leaders kicks the humor up a notch further. This rocks! 🙂
Thanks. So glad you enjoyed it!
I have to agree: funny and scary at the same time and probably very close to the way it would go 🙂
One can only hope that wouldn’t be the case but who knows.
Sad and scary….because I’m afraid it’s all too true……
Right, this was written as just a joke but who knows??
You see young Marissa now I know why I suggested you should be our Prime Minister all those weeks back.
Well, I’m not a millenial…that’s for sure!
Unlike Trump (who has been having a pop at the UK and other European nations this very day) you young Marissa are not ‘Intellectually challenged’
At least not by Trump standards.
Great poem. It makes us laugh while scaring us at the same time.
That’s what I always aim for. As long as someone pees their pants, I don’t really care how I made it happen!
Hahaha
Reblogged this on The Phil Factor and commented:
Please read this hilarious poem by the brilliant Marissa Bergen, whom I consider the Shel Silverstein for a new generation, maybe the Millenial generation. Thanks for the shout out Marissa!
Marissa….sheer genius!
Thank you Patricia! Always nice to hear that from you!
It’s still crazy that I don’t get your blog. The only time I see it is when someone re-blogs. I’m missing so much!
That is weird. All the blogs that I follow I have set to go directly to my email. Don’t even bother with the reader. Not sure if that helps.
We’ll see. I hope it does.
I’m afraid *genius* doesn’t quite cut it!!
I look forward to your posts SO MUCH!! I never know what to expect and you still manage to surprise me every. single. time.
A war of emoticons fought by text message with the biggest casualty being hurt feelings. Beautiful!! 😀
Thanks Joanne! Well, yes, these millenials are a very sensitive lot you know!
Just don’t give ’em a swipe right. The word gets out.
Mums that word.
I AM ON THE FLOOR HOWLING!!! OH, MARISSA! I cannot believe how bold you are! This is FREAKING FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A war with emoticons. OMG! And everything else you said. Oh, Girl, you have got nerve!!! I’m still laughing, choking, laughing ……
I’m glad you liked it Amy! It was a rather epic one for me… Going back and forth to the computer once I thought of the next line. Worth it to know it was enjoyed!
Marissa, this one was the BEST I have yet seen from you! Brilliant, just absolutely brilliant!
(blushing…and worrying if I will ever be able to top it!!)
I have every confidence you shall!!! You are a genius!!! For real!!!! GOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Awwwe, shucks!
That frowny face got ’em I’m sure. If not he can follow it up with the slap on the forehead emoticon.
A slap in the head emoticon??! Now that’s bustin’out with the heavy artillery!
I’m pretty sure that emoticon has not been approved by the United Nations either.
That’s highly likely.
🙂
Yours is one of my always read blogs in my reader. Such unpredictable subject matter and anything can happen from the first to the last stanza. How is that book coming along? 😀
Thanks so much! Oh, the book …right! Ha, ha! Maybe on the back burner for retirement.
If you bring it forward a couple of decades, you might be able to retire early!
I’m scared, but laughing….. Nervous laughter? Fearful laughter? I’ll just call you, we can talk it out. 😉
Sounds good to me…well the talking thing that is. The nervous and fearful laughter…well that’s just kind of weird!
Hey now….I thought we had this understanding….our weirdnesses are accepted by one another???? Right???
I don’t think it could be any other way!
🙂 Sounds like we get each other.
🙂 Sounds like we get each other.
🙂 Sounds like we get each other.
Of course!
Wow…you have accomplished something amazing here.
I see/read the signature Marissa humor and satire – I feel the real undertones and bigger message.
Seriously – this belongs in the New Yorker….
Perfect
Thanks Michelle! That’s quite a compliment. It was kind of epic for me so glad it got the response it did!
Yes – it definitely ‘felt’ different – in a good way! You know I will love everything you write, but this one kicked it up a notch.
life is cray-cray. What is a millenial?
Anyone who is being brought up
in the new millennium.
Ah, gotcha!
Agree with 10000hoursleft. I hope you pursue getting published sooner than later.
Thanks Kim! I’m waiting for the empty nest…ha, ha!
Reblogged this on Thoughts from the Front and commented:
Ok, this is just too good not to reblog. Marissa is a wonderful talent of a poet and I hope you enjoy her work (and then go follow her).
Ahh, this was simply perfect, and not to be quoting France (I would never do that), but it was totes dorbs (btw, yes, I actually say those words… much to my children’s chagrin).
Any compliment is a good compliment…even if it’s totes adorbs!!
Nice poem Marissa, a bit scary too! 🙂
Thanks Paola!