I Drive

I drive them to their friend’s houses
and to their music lessons
I drive them to the clubs, the parks
And to rehearsal sessions

Sometimes an extra kid or two
And sometimes even three
End up in my backseat their moms
Thought best leave drive to me

And so with designated driver
Title I am haunted
Like with some prize I never asked for
Much less even wanted

But maybe I could lose this honor
If they understood
I’m extremely under qualified
And just not very good

And indeed I have a gift
Perhaps a predilection
To lose my sense at even the
Most simple of directions

And weave within the lanes of traffic as
I do my best to guess
And peer and poke to see if we
Are nearing our address

So do you think if these moms knew
That every time I drive
With their dear children that I risk
Their young and precious lives

And take this duty from me that
Into my lap did drop
Oh reader I’ve not killed one yet
So sadly I think not.

Real live shot of my back seat…when the whole band needs a lift!!

44 thoughts on “I Drive

  1. Haven’t killed one yet? LOL! The kids are probably permanently stuck to the seats with all the spilled juice and Sunny Delight! My coworkers always used to make me drive when we went to lunch. So first, I removed the rear seats from my car, so I could fit only one extra person. Then, if anyone tried to take me up on that one extra seat, I’d hand them a towel to throw over it to keep from getting mud and dog hair all over their clothes. Pretty soon, they stopped asking. Voila! πŸ™‚

  2. And in return, do they drive you nuts?

    ANd by the way, “direction dyslexia” is a real thing. I’ve said for years I have it. I coined the phrase, feel free to use it. IT appears it fits you too!!!!

    • You mean, do the kids drive me nuts? Yes, sometimes. I was on a car ride to Long Beach and there was traffic the whole way so a 45 minute drive turned into a 90 minute one. We had my son’s friend in the car and he was singing along to a song but he kept singing the same words to the chorus even though the song doesn’t go like that. So essentially, every time the chorus to the song played, he would just sing ‘in a bag’ over and over. Oh Colleen… I could have put him in a bag…in the middle of the freeway.

      And as for this driving dyslexia thing…think we need a support group!

  3. I shudder to think of driving in L.A.! This takes me back to initially carting around a car full of giggling, loud, emotional junior high/high school girls….then later, a car full of sweaty, rugged, sometimes sullen, athletic boys. Looking back, though….I miss it all.

  4. LOL. Last two stanzas. So me. I bet I’m worse than you behind the wheel. I am just not coordinated…and had the hardest time understanding the GPS when we got it. There, I blew my cover. Now you know what I dunce I am.

    • I don’t know if you could be worse than me!! Yeah, GPS, I’m stumped. I only have it through my phone and can’t get it to talk to me while I’m driving so I need someone in the car with me to even use it!

    • Oh thanks Olga! I don’t know how permanent my return will be. Just got a bout of inspiration so I’m going with it but don’t want to commit myself to blogging on a regular basis. I got burned out on it so now I’m just taking it step by step.

  5. Wow this is brilliant!!!!…
    I could relate to this stanza:

    “And indeed I have a gift
    Perhaps a predilection
    To lose my sense at even the
    Most simple of directions” …

    Haha! ThatΒ΄s me too πŸ˜€ Also your poem reminded me of a great song by Lana del Rey: “Ride”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78oSuSMmFsE (“I hear the birds on the summer breeze,
    I drive fast, I am alone in midnight Been tryin’ hard not to get into trouble, But I, I’ve got a war in my mind. So, I just ride, just ride.)

    Sending much love! πŸ˜€

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