Please Sign My Hannukah Petition!

Some spell it with a C and H
Some with an extra K
I’ve seen it with a Q and X
And ends with H or A

And once I’ve gotten half way there
I have to start again
‘Cause I seem to have forgotten
Where to put the extra N

But it really shouldn’t matter
Where the wild wind it blows
When it comes to spelling Hanukah
It’s as if anything goes

All concept of grammar and
Religion have been shaken
Oy vey, like are they Jews?
Cause it’s more like they are pagan!!

Blatant abuse of language well
It’s causing quite a stir
Maybe now Mersh will worship but
Not wear a yamulke

But, oh yeah, while we are at it let’s
Condemn ourselves to hell
And go and spell it ‘yamika’
Like the goys think it’s spelled

Or perhaps its gone new agey and
It don’t like to be labeled
Or bogged down with proper grammar like
It’s brother dreidel (dreidl)

This is no less than anarchy
There must be a decision!
For correct spelling of Hannukah
I’m making a petition

And I hope that you will sign it but
One thing before you do
Tell me what you’re thinking should
It be one N or two?


60 thoughts on “Please Sign My Hannukah Petition!

    • Goy is a Yiddish word for someone who isn’t Jewish. Yamika is an incorrect spelling of Yarmulke, since I’m figuring that non Jewish people might not know how to spell the word correctly. It’s my dark sense of humor.

  1. Of course I LOVE this. But is there even an “n” at all in the holiday? My non-Jewish friend says Happy “Hamica” and always asks if her husband should wear a “yamica” when they come to our parties. I fully expect her to bring a baked ham and some yams whenever it’s potluck. Good job on this!!

  2. I think I used to date a girl named Yamika. She designed hats, or at least, I think she did. She wanted me to wear one but they were puffy hats. So she dumped me. For some goy in a puffy shirt.

    The reason nobody knows how to spell it is because the Maccabees couldn’t spell worth a darn. Happy Hanukkah, my friend.

  3. Good God. I didn’t know it was going to be a spelling test! I would have studied!

    I hope your {insert proper spelling here} was peaceful, and appropriately calorie-laden, full of family laughter, and …. chocolate.
    Always Happy Chocolate.

  4. Oops, a very belated Happy Hanukkah to you and nor sure how a true Jewish person would spell any of the terms here, Marissa!
    Hope you had a special month of fun times and will have a very wonderful new year of 2017! Party on, to the most rocking family of the Cheesebergens! ❀

  5. Love it when you dip your toes back into your wicked good poetry. I may (or may not) have used ” Oy Vey” in a sentence last week and got silly looks from my husband. Happy Hannukah to you and your family!! xo

    • The Yiddish language really does offer the best expressions. It’s hard not to incorporate them into every day life no matter what your background is. Thanks for your kind words and hope you are enjoying the holiday season!

  6. Happy Hannukah Marissa. I think it should be two N’s with one A and H before it, just like the word happy, two p’s with one A and H before p. I just wonder both words start with H, but happy ends in Y and Hannukah ends with H. Perhaps because celebrating Hannukah makes people happy and being happy is always a question of Y (why)… Thanks Marissa, the poem is funny.

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