They say our love was toxic and
It ran it’s fated course
It’s no surprise we’re headed for
A quite ugly divorce
I didn’t like the way you breathed
I drained your life of joy
I cheated with the chauffeur and
You slept with the pool boy
You took the dog you took the yacht
Said you were unfulfilled
But I think it’s a little much
To go and have me killed
But if you want to play that game
Then go do as you please
Cause now you are a victim of
Venereal disease
You should have got that looked at but
You thought you would be fine
So now I’ll have to castrate you
Right there in chapter nine
And maybe that’s a little harsh
Or maybe downright evil
But you don’t even want to know
What happens in the sequel
Where there will be no limits to
The ways in which you’ll suffer
You just may lose your job and have to
Move in with your mother
Followed by such grievances
And all in my defense
Let’s talk about a series of
Unfortunate events
Most venomous of poison pens
That ever did exist
And leaves yours in the dust trails of
The Times bestseller list
The royalties are rolling in
But you have the last laugh
For your well planned hesitation now
I have to give you half
I loved the spats and anguish in here! ! ๐๐
Thanks! All part of the fun for me!
Yeah! Great going Marissa ๐๐
There is a modern take on the poison pen, it’s the poison pixel. Both will do great harm.
Yes, that is true. I imagine the poison pen concept can be modernized in many ways with all the social media options!
This is great, Marissa. We writers know just how to get even. The last stanza sucks though. Half? Really? ๐ฆ
Well, having never actually divorced myself I wouldn’t know for sure but my understanding is everything is split down the middle. I saw some video circulating on social media not too long ago where a guy took that very literally and cut everything they had in half…with a chain saw!
What a crazy nut! I would definitely kill him off in a novel.
inter-esting in-deed.
Those pens there look positively evil – sure they’re not disguised darts?
Ha, ha! I wouldn’t put it past these characters!
A dose caught from the pool boy! Best not to take a swim.
Duly noted!
Holy joy, Marissa! That was a river of strong emotions flowing into a most successful book. Cool to live out the frustrations in such benefitting ways even when you only get 50% out! But for 50% you even need to be thankful for the inspiriation through the frustration and resentments you were gifted with…LOL
Yes, I’d tend to agree. Maybe a bit of Taylor Swift in this one? ha. ha!
Haha….. inspiration everywhere… lol!
I’m thinking more Alice Cooper than Taylor Swift.
Good thinking!
Ohhhh I love this vindictive spirit!
Thanks…I don’t know where it comes from! (Yeah, right!)
Ooooo! I love it when you’re feisty like this!
It’s a dirty job but someone’s gotta do it!
Ouch! This bitterness and anger is over-the-top!
I liked MamaMickTerry’s comment – you are really feisty today! Look out world ๐
Yep, I’m killing with a glance!!
They say never piss off a writer… I concur!
They also say never put anything in writing! Ha, ha! Perhaps i can beg to differ on that one!
This is where pseudonyms come in handy! ๐
Ha, yes, for sure!
He who hesitates gets half. ..oh say it isn’t so! I am familiar with those pens myself ๐
And apparently so is Taylor Swift! Ha, ha! I don’t think anyone got half of that!
Oh my, I’m behind on my pop culture news..I must check it out. …
Oh, well just that she is constantly writing about her exes in her songs. If you don’t know that about Taylor Swift, I can only say ‘more power to you!’
Oh yes, I knew that about her but she seems to be clever in concealing their identities.
A Prequel to “Lemonade”?
Sure, why not?
That’s the issue with being married to a writer… love or hate, we will make sure the world knows what kind of person you are.
Yes, seems to be the case. This was actually inspired by an article I read about the many authors who put down their exes in literature.
Half is quite a bit, but in many cases that is the going rate. And as a writer, Have my list of characters (from real life people. That will be my revenge.
Fortunately I’ve never been through a divorce so not sure how accurate the 50% is but it sure sounded better than, say 25, for the poems sake!
Hope it stays that way.
I’m not sure if all the royalties in the world would make up for moving back in with the Mother. ..
Oh yeah, that’s a bad one!
Made me laugh from the get go. My daughter told me a few months ago I get mad at my husband for the way he breathes. Now I keep yelling at him for breathing. ๐
Good luck with getting him to stop!
No desire to do that!!!! ๐
Reminds me that cartoon my daughter watches, “Grojband” where she writes at the height of her emotions (whether sad or happy) and her brother who’s at a band steals her diary and sings bout it.
oooh, that’s a good one! I like it!
You have some fantastic, fancy pens, Marissa! I like the hesitation which brings the more even split of money. ๐
I also thought rhyming “evil” with the upcoming “sequel” was awesome. Your cadence and words were really in tune, having a great “vibe” and “beat.” ๐
Thanks! It’s always a struggle to keep that rhythm and make everything rhyme (or nearly, as the case my be). Your recognition of this is priceless, Robin. I’m glad you enjoyed!
Funny enough, I answered this earlier but obviously it didn’t take! I work hard on my rhyming a rhythm and it makes all the difference when someone notices. Thank you Robin!
Femme fatale with pen in hand.. awesome!
Almost rhymes and could well be the title! Thanks Syl!
You’re welcome, Marissa!
The best and most conclusive example of retributive justice ๐ … love it, dear Marissa.
Sending love & best wishes!. Aquileana ๐
Thank you Aquileana!
If they don’t want to be in the book, they should have been nicer to me, I say. /shrugs
Indeed! And thank you for the reblog! They say never to put anything in writing but I might beg to differ!
Murderous intent, channeled the right way, can mean job security!
For sure!
Reblogged this on HemmingPlay and commented:
Funny. Love Merissa. And it’s true when you’re dealing with a writer. If you didn’t want to be in the book, you should have been nicer to me. ๐
Ha-ha. This would make a great Lifetime movie
Ha, ha! Thanks Tosha! Where can I submit the pilot?
Dramaaintjustforyourmama.com
Oh, that’s great!
๐
That’s the truth! ๐
Thanks Rachel!
So- what happens in the sequel? This was such a good read – very funny! ๐
Ha, ha! Not sure…maybe I should write it…
Yes! Do!!
I loved this one! ๐
Very funny! Revenge! ๐
Yes, revenge is sweet!