The Gypping Gypsy

images-2She said she sees great bravery
But also she sees fears
And that someone I love will die
In the next 50 years

That I am super happy now
In fact over the moon
Or if that is not the case hold on
Because it will be soon

She said it’s very likely that
My panty hose will rip
That 90% or more of my
Nail polishes will chip

And at some point someone I know
Might somehow be in danger
That within the next week or so
I’m sure to meet a stranger

She said that in my future I’ll
Have both good and bad luck
But I see myself about to be
Ripped off for 20 bucks.

78 thoughts on “The Gypping Gypsy

  1. Speaking as the time-traveller that I am young Marissa for the small fee of ten grand I’ll let you know next weeks lottery numbers…a honest offer, take it or leave it!

  2. haha! Is she a fortune teller or captain obvious! As a side, a peer of mine, who got fired several years back, has a new line of work. A fortune teller!

  3. They never say anything specific. I’ve always wondered what it’d be like. I’ve always had this idea that they’d find me and then tell me what I needed to hear – without spending a fortune.

    • Yeah, maybe. I remember once when I was in Brooklyn heading on the train to Manhattan there were two gypsy women outside their shop trying to lure me in. They were saying they saw money and romance in my future. Let’s just say I’m glad it stopped there.

  4. That rings a couple of bells. It would be great if the said something like “You married the wrong person, and there is no hope of you finding the right person. You are in the wrong job, and with your character there is no right job, and you are about to fall prey to a debilitating illness which will affect your ability to enjoy life although not be life-threatening. $ 20 please.”

    Would anyone pay up in those circumstances ? ha ha ha ha

    • I don’t know but at least some of that information might be useful. I did some research before writing this and found that a lot of people get these fortunes done and it changes their lives…like if someone says that there will be a disaster they’re afraid of getting in their cars, or if someone says they’ll never find love, they’re afraid of having a fight with their boy/girlfriends. Guess there are some things better left unknown.

      • I’ve been to a few in my lifetime, just out of curiosity and a bit of fun. I agree that the power of suggestion is a big factor. Actually I did find one card reader that was very accurate about my past (which was shocking), but the future predictions were iffy. I still haven’t won the lottery like she said I would, after 20 years has passed since our meeting.

      • Well, it makes sense. For the past you have to be pretty much spot on because you’re comparing to events that already happened. For the future you can be more vague.

  5. Thid was a funny post~ usually they are so wrong! I had my fortune told at age 22, suggested I had a long lifeline, husband #1 would be a “short marriage,” the next one “would last forever.” The first I had my two oldest children and married 6 years, knew him 10 altogether. The next one lasted only a year but I got my youngest daughter!
    Marissa, I am very good friends with #1 and his third wife. We share kids and grandkids, some birthday parties but no holidays. His sister, brother, Mom, and Dad have all died so I have known him since we were 18. (42 years) His longest friendship, he says. Not sure if gypsy was totally right but she suggested I not get married at 22 and I did anyway. 🙂 Maybe my life would have gone differently. . . .

    • Well I certainly don’t have any stories that quite compare but a gypsy did once try to lure me in by telling me I would have an exciting life full of sex and money. Let’s just say, I’m glad I didn’t pay for that!

      • Well, at least, Marissa, she had your life right! Doesn’t rock and roll get you sex and money? 🙂
        Mine only tried to save me a little bit of time and heartache. . . I would say it was worth the money but my stubborn young self didn’t listen!!

  6. A woman in my book club has a daughter who ran off when she was a teenager and married The King of the Gypsies, somewhere in Queens, I think, though she met him on the road. Eventually The King died, being around 70 at the time of the marriage, and the girl returned home. I love the idea of gypsies but not the reality. The heroine of your poem is lucky to have just parted with $20!!!

    • That story sounds like something that would never really happen….not that I don’t believe you but it just seems like a King of the Gypsies would never really exist. It’s a great story in any case.

      • Apparently, he called himself that but I think (so my friend told me) that different men in different gypsy communities give themselves that title. It’s one of the strangest “true life” stories I have ever heard. I want my friend’s daughter to write a book, but they all seem deeply embarrassed by it and that they just want to forget the whole thing. Apparently, she (the daughter, a nice Jewish girl whose father was a doctor) told fortunes and the whole bit.

      • Yes, I think a lot of people who write autobiographies end up with a lot of pain for ‘exposing’ themselves and regret. On the other hand, I’m about to name myself Queen of something or other…just can’t decide of what…

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