Tut Tut Tales

Three Second Rule

Marcus Mike Maximus Brown
I say it isn’t cool
How when your cake falls on the floor
You call 3 second rule

And when ice cream falls from your cone
Then for it you will dive
And then that old 3 second rule
Can become 4 or 5

But when your brussel sprouts fall down
Just bending is a chore
And it’s unfit for your mouth now
As it’s been on the floor.

Janey Jones

Janey Jones thought it’s be cool
To jump around while in the pool
She jumped and jumped with all her might
And reached the most impressive heights

And Janey she caused such a stir
That all did turn to look at her
And so she reached the water’s top
And even then she did not stop

Which would have been completely awesome
If not for her bikini bottoms
Which I’m quite sure she did not know
Floated somewhere down below.

 

A bit of a collection here…I wrote these over the weekend and thought they went together in a childlike way. I called the blog Tut Tut Tales after a book I read as a child by Marjorie Barrows, which I don’t exactly remember but the name seemed to fit.

I’d also like to thank Robin at Witless Dating After Fiftyย and Inchcock at, well, Inchcockย for inspiration although I’m not sure they will recognize it’s source.

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59 thoughts on “Tut Tut Tales

  1. I like the title. .and I like the selective application of the 3 second rule. I know about bikini mishaps as my sister had one that involved the top piece on a high dive, and of course, like a good historian, I have written about that too ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Janey Jones reminds me of an event from years back when my middle son was about 5-6 years old. I was sat poolside reading a newspaper I recall while young Leo was merrily sliding down a water slide…only on this occasion the young lady (mum to the little girl who preceded her) came head first down said slide at some speed and when she hit the water right in front of me…well…how shall I put it…lets just say the bikini she wore ended up more off than on. I averted my gaze the moment I heard her scream of course!

  3. While in Florida as a teen, I body surfed in a bikini. I got tossed around a lot under the water and when I came up my bikini top was off. I didn’t know it until I looked down. I was a wee embarassed. I enjoyed the childlike JOY in these, Marissa. Thank you!!! ๐Ÿ™‚ (((HUGS))) Amy โค

  4. Yes, I’ve been a Janey Jones! Didn’t do a high dive but the water came from up high! Forcefully pulled down my swim top along too. I’ve never read the book. Maybe I’ll get it for my kids…

    • Actually that one was inspired yesterday when I went to the pool with my daughter and both of us started jumping and I noticed we were both hanging onto our swim suit bottoms for dear life. But yes, you’re right, it can also happen if the water comes from above.

      I can’t really recommend the book because I don’t remember it that well but if the title stuck in my mind, it was probably good. In googling it yesterday, just to make sure my facts were straight, I saw that there was a copy being sold online for $1. Can’t really go wrong unless shipping is ridiculous!!

    • Oh thanks. Seems I remember the title of the book better than the book itself. I googled it just to be sure it really existed and wasn’t just something made up in my childhood imagination.

  5. Thanks, Marissa, for mentioning me! I definitely recognize this book and the author is very old fashioned. Your stories are much more humorous and light hearted.
    I could easily illustrate your two additions. First, would probably be trite but would show Marcus with red unruly hair with a curl “in the middle of his forehead” since he is a picky eater and “horrid.” ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
    Then, little Janey with her bikini bottom floating in the pool while she was jumping way up high in the sky may incite some censorship committee at the inappropriate drawing of girl with no bikini bottoms.
    Alas, probably best for readers to enjoy your descriptions sans pictures. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Well I enjoy the visuals nonetheless. I’m actually thinking something a bit more angelic, like the Coppertine girl type of thing for Janey Jones. The 3 Second rule poem was inspired by the quote you put in your blog about kids being full For veggies and not for dessert.

      • Thank you for letting me know what had triggered the boy’s tale while I caught your comment about you and your daughter bouncing up and down in the pool and holding on so the bottoms would stay on. This made me laugh, Marissa. In our family, the girls have big bottoms do no chance of those “babies” coming off. We have more of a chance our tops will come off, since whereas some lucky ladies have coconuts, we (Mom, my 2 daughters and I) have kiwis.

      • Oh goodness, Robin. I giggled when I read this last night. I’m afraid I’m a bit stick like although, well, they did get bigger after babies. Let’s just say peaches….

  6. An excellent collection on our human versatility. We can scour a floor or not, depending on what we dropped, and live with bottoms exposed – as long as we have on a top. The Empress of Rhyme comes through time after time. I can’t wait to read the epic cantos when you finish it. ๐Ÿ™‚

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