I’d tell the pope a dirty joke
Blow raspberries at a nun
Hold up the New York Federal reserve
With a rubber tommy water gun
I’d put my face into the ground
And lick up worms and dirt
Go to a gangsta rap concert
Wearing a Slayer shirt
I would take the neighbor’s dog
Out on a dinner date
Go streaking naked at next year’s
Ride through the desert backwards on
A quite ill tempered llama
I’d wear a garbage bag to work
I’d French kiss your mama
I’d jump a double decker bus
In a high end sports car
And that my friend is what I’d do
For a Klondike bar….
Especially if it was Reese’s.
I’d like to thank my son Jesse Bergen for the inspiration for this one.