Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

imgres-17A master of all awkward lines,
In party conversation,
Where it seems the more I talk the farther,
I stray from salvation.

Another backwards compliment,
I guess I should be shunned,
For not just saying “You look great!”
But “Where’d you get your work done?”

And then into an occupied,
Bathroom I did walk,
Without seeing the sign that said,
“Door doesn’t lock, please knock!”

And when I finally get my turn,
I look in the mirror with grief,
No one had been kind enough to point out,
I had spinach in my teeth.

But lest that went unnoticed,
While milling ’round the place,
I had the misfortune of backing into and shattering,
A very expensive vase.

And as the party guests quieted down,
And all were awkwardly staring,
With narrowed eyes and curled lips,
(Perhaps you’d call it glaring),

Maybe crickets should be cued in,
To fill this void I made so,
As I wonder in my mind,
“Should i stay or should i go?”

When I decide I’ll take this stupid,
Party for all it’s worth,
Clear my throat and inquire,
“I was told there’d be dessert…”

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56 thoughts on “Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

  1. For us house guests who have spilled red wine on a white carpet/couch/shirt; offended a hostess by swearing too much; insisted on wearing shoes in the house; overheard saying the wall colour looked like chum and shit mated; vomited on peonies in full bloom, and some other stuff, too, we salute you! Totally appreciated this awesome poem! TiV

  2. Thank you for referencing one of my favorite 80’s songs in the title. Me and my friends once did that song for an air band contest in front of about 200 people.

  3. Ugh, I’m sorry I’m late to the party with my comment. And What entertaining potluck this is (all contributed by you, of course!) The best of your rhyming elements wrapped up into one helluva goody bag! Guests will feast for days….
    Stephanie

  4. I was referred to your blog by Stephanie Lewis (Little Miss Menopause). I’m glad she did. Good poems and my kind of thinking. That’s meant to be a compliment but if you ever read my stuff then just think of it as well intentioned. Anyway, good blog and posts.

    • Wow, to be referred by Little Miss Menopause is quite a high compliment. I put a follow on your blog, which is what I always try to do when someone follows me. I’m very good at reading people’s posts and I can’t wait to see your output. Any friend of Stephanie’s is a friend of mine!

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